Characters: Birdo and her students!
What: Humanization class no. 1!
Where: Stadium.
When: Saturday, the 11th.
Rating: PG-13 for some inevitable awkwardness.

*When the students arrive, the Stadium is mostly empty, save for a table, and several large boxes. On the table, Catherine's set three items: one being a transformation ball, one being a necklace, and the third being what appears to be a CD. Catherine stands off to the side of the table, a bathrobe hanging rather awkwardly over the much-too-small reptilian body then trying to occupy it. She waves happily at the students as they enter, and waits until enough had shown up before beginning to speak.*

( Wall'o'Text )

Are we going to have students here this time?

Lemme dig up my plans from the class two weeks ago that nobody attended.... ahem!

Today we're meeting outside on the track to do some warmup exercises to further adapt to your new forms (Especially if you've gained new or alternately built limbs) Be sure to be in proper athletic attire and you can carry some water with you. Obviously, you should already be in your human forms for this training

More discussions, questions, and storytelling will also commence until the hour's up. Also before the end of class, we'll have one particular discussion about the future of these seminars. Anyone in need of it can still come back to these sessions for counseling and other means of help, but depending on how many new students we get popping in mid-semester, I may have to start the course again from Day 1. I feel lazy just thinking about it!

hmm...

Also, I have a student who's looking into being my new assistant along with Lombardi. I'm sure many of you know Miss Chansey from Nurse Cathrine's office. Now you girls have someone to look up to instead of just sitting back and having to listen to gross male stories, and she can provide medical assistance to all! *leers at Goombario*


So... Loosen up!

HUMANIZATION SEMINAR, SATURDAY, JUNE 14th.

Today we're meeting outside on the track to do some warmup exercises to further adapt to your new forms (Especially if you've gained new or alternately built limbs) You may run back to your dorms or gym lockers to obtain appropriate gym attire and bottled water and assemble back here. Obviously, you should already be in your human forms for this training

More discussions, questions, and storytelling will also commence until the hour's up and I'll be sticking around for an extra half hour if you want to make up time for the delay when changing. My apologies for not announcing this session ahead of time.

Anyone who feels this session today to be moot point can skip out for the day.

Also, I have a student who's looking into being my new assistant along with Lombardi. I'm sure many of you know Miss Chansey from Nurse Cathrine's office. Now you girls have someone to look up to instead of just sitting back and having to listen to gross male stories, and she can provide medical assistance to all! *leers at Goombario*


So... Loosen up!

Week four of this humanization seminar

There's really not much more to teach from here on in, guys. I have one small lecture (it looks like I'm getting pretty decent at this lecturing stuff again) and the rest of this hour will be spent with you guys honing your transformation abilities under my watch (or Lombardi's if he shows up today...) as coaching may or may not be needed and we will all share more stories and discussions about life in school and society as humans.

So everyone bring your chairs around in a circle just like last time.


This one last method of transformation is actually what we covered on the first week. The transformation balls many of you had used back then is a form of EXTERNAL MAGIC.

This form does not come from your own magical abilities, but instead from someone else or an inanimate objects. Some Wizards can change you into anything with a simple wand flick and the properties of that spell depend on the wizard's ability with remote transformation.

Unfortunately, we don't have any wizards here to demonstrate that.

We do, however, have some inanimate objects and a frequent user of this technique. She was a student of my Zoology class three years ago and I just ran into her last week...

So... uh... Meet Kazooie. *she's standing next to his desk* Yes I must seem to have an endless supply of birds in my classes. Shut up.

You see she's perfectly human now, right?

Can I see those earrings?

*kazooie rolls her eyes and takes off both earrings at once, which makes her a bird in one poof*

*leon snatches earrings* See, these are the source of her evil powers! these earrings contain a concentrated magical force that changes her when she wears them.

Who wants to try these on?

*kazooie snatches em back and holds em up to where her ears would be and poofs human again*

Fine then.

Different external magic items have different effects.

Transformation balls have a 24-hour effect. No more, no less, no cancellation abilities.

Chicken-chick's earrings here work as long as worn

*pulls out something from bag* This stick of gum in my bag is magical transformation gum that will keep you human as long as the flavor lasts.

*pulls out something else* These human pills must be taken orally once every six hours to retain your form. Possible side effects may occur such as nose bleeding, upset stomach, constipation, drowsiness, itchy eyes, headache, fever, and sexual complications. There's also a risk of dependancy.

This magically-contaminated slab of beef works until the food is completely digested in your system

Magic coffee lasts as long as the caffiene does.

And last with me, This teddy bear emits its powers when hugged. Your form length varies, but hugging said bear again will restart your duration clock. Custom-made stuffed animals by hand-crafting wizards CAN last infinitely, but manufactured stuffies die out after a certain number of hugs. Depending on the brand.


Mind you- if depended on, most of these methods and external magic in general are VERY EXPENSIVE to come by or keep up with unless you have a magic buddy to hook you up with something. I lost an entire paycheck on the beef once! Not pretty!

There's more stuff out there if skilled transformation isn't for you and you can be arsed to pay for it.

But for now its time to practice your skills.

This too long;didn't listen crap is over for now.

Transformation Seminar - Session 3

Everyone arrange your seats in a circle and gather 'round!

We're gonna go right onto the good stuff.

Allow me to reintroduce myself to both the new students in this seminar and anyone who doesn't recognize me as I currently stand before you. You may call me Powalski. I am your counselor for this stuff this semester.

At this point, we're pretty much through using transformation balls, but if you're new or a pathetic learner, you can come to my office tonight for a recap of previous week's sessions or more transformation balls.

And feel free to bring up any pressing issues you may happen to have about your human forms. It sure took me a while to get used to excreting solids and liquids through two different places and not at the same time anymore......... I could tell a lot of stories about my first days at this crap!

But anyway....


MAGIC.


It gets a little complex from here, but the two most conventional methods of transformation lie in the art of magic skill and ninjitsu. Those of you who have any magic ability will rely on the former and the rest on the later.

Where or how you get your magic ability is not my concern. Take magic users 101 sometime for a comprehensive study on the matter. I'm not Harry Potter!


All magic users have... magical energy called "SP". It may have another name where you came from, but to the point: The amount of tricks and spells you can cast are determined by how much magic energy you have. This is easy because all you have to do is learn a spell from somewhere- I have pamphlets up here with several spell calls you can try out- and then you just call on and off the spell anytime you please.

The maximum duration of your spell varies with how experienced you are with the spell and magic in general. Your magic energy used for a transformation can deplete anywhere from 1SP an hour to 50SP a minute. If you're really good, it might slow down to 1SP a week.

When your energy is drained, you change back instantly. A can of elixer or something similar can pep you back up easilly. Sleep also works but not if you're sleeping in human form.

Magic users can take a handout and try a spell. These contain hundreds of humanization spell calls from all over the world, so one has to be right for you!


As for Pokemon, there's a TM that can grant you humanization powers, but it WILL count as one of your four techniques to choose wisely if you need to forget a move for this..


NINJA METHODS.

That's typically what I use, and it takes a lot of practice to get it right, but I don't have a magical bone in my body.

You'll need to read a bit on the history of this because I'm lazy, but instead of magic energy, you're dealing with chakra- or the life force inside you, and you have to channel your spiritual energy through meditation to flow through your entire body and focus on the transformation you want. The process gets speedier the more you do it, and the duration of your new form is dependant on how long your chakra can focus- and more experience will grant you more time.

I think my first transformation lasted me..... seven seconds!


But by the weekend I was able to make four minutes!


Everyone else managed at least two days on their first shot, though...

Normally you don't have to think about it all the time to keep your form, but extreme levels of stress, rage, or anything too sidetracky will shut you off like a switch and you'll have to refocus your energy all over again. I call it mental suicide!

If you switch off yourself at anytime, Like ... Lombardi.... did in the first class >_>, you can relatively change back again with minimal effort since it doesn't strain your focus.

I have handouts on this, too!


*concentrates for a few seconds and snaps fingers/poofs into human form* Have fun lolligagging with this stuff!

Welcome to session 2 of the humanization seminar.

Sorry this wasn't run on Friday night as planned, but it looks like we've gotten a bunch of new students admitted over the weekend so this turned out to be good timing!

Here's what we're going to do:
Each of you who attended the last session will share with all of us your new experiences with your first day being a human. How you felt? How you were able to get around, how those 24 hours of your life went, and then some.

Then we'll have a review where each of you newcomers will pair up with someone who was here last week, and the oldbie will teach the newbie everything we discussed last time and how to use the transformation balls.

If we have time within the hour, we'll move onto lecture about the ninja jutsu technique, otherwise, I have more transformation balls to last you guys for another week. If you need anymore, or to speak to me for any reason, my office is in the science department... though I spend more time in the teacher's lounge...

Towels are here for you first-timers, I hope you returnees brought clothes this time, if not, I'll be doing a headcount of who wears what size and my assistant Petey will bring in some new uniforms. I should have thought of this last week...


So let's carry on! But not so loud because I have a killer headache!

Ladies! Gentlmen! Freaks and Pokemon!


You're.... pretty much piling up in this room because you are attending your first human transformation seminar. or "gijinka" as the Japanese call it somewhere.... over... in Japanland... Ain't that place supposed to be fictional like the United States? Who writes this crap?

Aniway...

My name is Powalski. Mr. Venomoth had to return to the Pewter Gym this year so I'll be taking over as your counselor for these sessions. My office is in the science department should anyone need to see me regarding these sessions.


so...


Before we started..... umm....

Everyone take a towel from the front of the room. *reading former gijinka counselor's lecture notes as he sits on the desk and points to the towels beside him* Those of you who don't normally wear clothes will be assigned uniforms after this seminar when we can determine your size and for now will cover yourself with these towels if anybody happens to be uncomfortable with human nudity.

*puts paper down* Where's Lombardi? He's late! *eyes back on paper*

Please note that these seminars are purely for the transformation process and for getting accustomed to going about your school and important duties in your new human form. Exploration of your new physiology on intimate levels should be left to your own time. And this is a co-ed group so it is important you respect everyone around you regardless of their appearance.

*puts paper down again* Wow! This guy was well-prepared! Just like when I first joined his seminars! *reads more*

and on a final note... Oh screw this fine print! *tosses paper*

Transformation can be done in a number of ways. Two of the most common methods are through magic and ninja jutsu, and you just need to learn the technique depending on which works better for you.

But that's for another day.

For now we have these! *pulls out a shopping bag from his chair behind the desk and plops it on the first student desk in front of him*



These gayly-colored smashball-wannabees will transform you in an instant! ... you just have to hit it hard enough. These balls of forced energy will last your transformation twenty-four hours and you'll each get enough for a week. That's all there is to it!

Using magic or other conventional practices to transform last depending on your magic or spiritual energy. Or chakra. Whatever you kids wanna call it, and It'll last anywhere from one hour to.... I dunno! But you last longer as you keep gaining experience with your transformation. At least that's how it worked with me. I'll be two months human on the 29th! ... or 28th since today was a leap year... That extra day has to mess up everything! You can also transform back whenever you wish, which you'll see momentarily

But I'll get on to such methods next seminar, and since I'm sure as hell not breaking my record, we'll have a highly experienced senior with us giving demonstrations!



...

Oh yeah! There's also this little catch where there's some things you miscellany creatures can't do as humans. Depending on what you normally are, but that's pretty damn obvious, right?

And all Pokemon, regardless of type, will have their powers restricted to normal-type attacks, so I'm supposed to give brawl excuse notes to anyone under the 24-hour thing.


Everyone take a ball and... chatter amongst yourselves until our model student arrives. I'm gonna play solitare on my DS.