smash_logs | HAPPY NEW YEAR

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HAPPY NEW YEAR

Who: Anyone of legal drinking age or with a good fake ID
What: A BAR LOG: NEW YEAR'S EDITION
When: New Year's Eve
Where: The Birdcage
Warnings: I think there may be alcohol references in this bar log. Also probably sloppy makeouts come midnight.

The Birdcage may have taken a hit during the destructive riots in the city over the summer, but like a majestic phoenix, it had risen from the ashes and looked better than ever with its renovations - just in time for one of the biggest nights of the year. The lights shone brighter and more colourful than ever, the bar was stocked with fresh new liquors from around the globe (and beyond), the music rang loud and clear through new speakers, the stage was more elaborate and featured all kinds of drag and burlesque troupes...

It was simply fabulous.

And on this New Year's Eve, it was packed from wall to wall with those reveling in the joy of having their favourite bar back and eager to see what the next year has in store. The patrons were brought together from all walks of life, all timelines and universes and races and lifestyles, to celebrate together and bask in the warm buzz of a good drink.

Some of them were here from Smash Academy. Why? Maybe they planned in advance. Maybe it was spur of the moment in an attempt to not spend New Year's miserable and alone while sober. Maybe it had to do with that brochure for the grand reopening that kept appearing on the bulletin board outside the cafeteria no matter how many times a certain hall monitor and other concerned folk took it down.

THE POINT IS. It's a drinking log. Go nuts.

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It was always nice to go to a bar where he wasn't the bouncer.

He was more than happy to purchase a few massive, pineapple flavored, coconut infused, mango-slice-having, umbrella waving, curly straw equipped cocktails.

He loved those things.

Please excuse this fragrant-smelling man staring at your drink. Hey, wasn't he one of Max's guys? Anyway, he was gaping at the pineapple flavored, coconut infused, mango-slice-having, umbrella waving, curly straw equipped cocktail like it was the most delicious thing he'd ever seen. Never mind that it was probably the most unmanly drink possible, that was what Vinnie wanted to drink.

"What is that?" He asked with awe, sounding pretty damn tipsy already. "What's it called...?"

"Pina Colada Squared!" Knuckles replied with a grin. "Hey, I know you. It was... uhh.... Geeze, gimme a sec..."

They'd talked about exploding beedrills. And he'd bought a vegan chai tea off him once...

"Vinnie! Right? You're a pal of Max, too, huh?" Knuckles wasn't quite tipsy, but he was socially lubricated enough to shove his hand in the air and order another one for the Venusaur. "It's really good, guy. My treat!"

Gosh, he remembered him. That was cool. Vinnie remembered he was a cool guy. He nodded vigorously, and might've started to drunkenly ramble. "Uh-huh. An' you're Knuckles! You have an island an' you can benchpress a shitton. Bulba told me 'bout it - the island, I mean... he likes it."

The Venusaur hadn't expected Knuckles to get the drink for him, though. He blinked. "Seriously? Y'don't have to, I mean. I can pay for it."

"You got it - Knuckles." the Echidna replied with a nod. "Glad to know Bulba likes the ole Homestead! And I can press two actual shittons. New years resolution is to get my number up to three."

Was it an actual unit of measure? Sources say: Yes.

He waved a hand dismissively. "Don't worry about it. I ain't stingy. I don't mind springing for a drink or two." He accepted the glass and slid it down the bar towards Vinnie. "Enjoy, guy!"

It was when you're drunk! Vinnie caught the drink as he marvelled at all these shittons. "That's a lot... I can't even bench one shitton. I think."

What a mysterious straw this was. He took a second to locate the end and stuck it in his mouth. Siiiip.

There was a bit of a delay as the drink travelled through the curly straw...

But it was delicious.

"This is so good..." (And also stronger than he expected, from a fruity drink.) Vinnie turned to look at Knuckles. "You're a cool guy. You're a cool guy and you can bench shittons. All Max does is yell at me."

"He yells at me too - that's just his way. I think he yells because he cares. He doesn't know how to care without yelling." Knuckles replied sagely, picking the mango slice out of his drink with his teeth and munching it down. "He's a little calmer than he used to be way back in the day."

"Hey, you're a cool guy too! Vegan, right? I respect that - it's harder to do than a lot of people think. Stuff out here has a lot of dairy in it. Even stuff you wouldn't figure would need dairy in it." It showed up in surprising places. Slightly less places than things that were supposed to be dairy but didn't have any actual dairy in them.

Vinnie nodded, though he didn't really consider his veganism all that exceptional. A hassle sometimes, sure. "It's just what I grew up eating. I mean, before I knew there was a name for that kinda diet. Haven't had milk in so long it just makes my stomach feel sick anyway. Once I turned into a Charizard but I threw up the first few times I tried to eat meat."

Sounding somewhat sagely in his drunkenness, he added, "I'm real good at throwin' up though." Marvellous.

"My people used to eat meat." he said, opening his mouth and pointing to his long canines. "I've never seen the appeal. Somethin' has to die just so I can have a sandwich? I don't like that."

He paused.

"I DID try ham once. It was OK. Because a girl I liked liked it."

The best reason for a guy to do anything dumb, right?

"I didn't vomit though. Is that really a good skill to have? Vomiting?" Because he seemed pretty proud of it.

It was probably the main reason all guys do anything dumb.

In a lower voice, Vinnie muttered, "My people eat bugs. Sometimes I eat bugs." So it's sorta like 'vegetarian who eats fish', except 'vegan who eats flies'. He's cut back considerably on that though, ever since he realized there are bugs who can also be students.

On the subject of vomit, though... "Oh. Oh yeah. I have t'be able to fight people with vomit. I can throw up pretty far, too. Then there's aiming... practicin' is messy." Vinnie you were real proud of yourself.

"Apparently my people evolved from creatures that eat mostly ants." Knuckles confided in his new friend. "I got no clue how that's sposda work but there you go."

He drained the last little bit out of his glass and ordered another.

"Man. That's crazy. I don't think I could ever fight anyone like that. I mean, I'm pretty good at fighting but I've never thought of using vomit. Or like... aiming it at stuff. I mostly just punch things." he said, flexing his hands so Vinnie could see the things he was named for. "I can make my punches explode, which is pretty great."

Those were some mighty fine namesakes. Mighty fine.

"I used t'be able t'make my vomit explode. It was... it was like a bomb. Made of sludge." A sludge bomb.

Vinnie quickly turned to Knuckles like he'd suddenly realized something really important that he needed to be aware of right now. "What if you punched someone in th' gut, and they threw up all over you? There'd be no way t'avoid it. That'd be point blank vomit."

It was a very real danger that everyone had to be aware of, when punching.

"Shiiiiii--"

He'd never actually thought about the dangers of fighting a Vomiter. Like... someone who could wield bile as a weapon.

"And I have kinda big eyes, guy. I mean... that wouldn't end well. Geeze. Damn. Geeze."

Geeze.

"Remind me to never punch you in the gut, man. Like if we spar or anything."

Yeah, man. What if a zombies happened and you punched a Boomer, Knuckles. You'd be screwed.

"Okay." Vinnie very earnestly told him, "If we ever spar, I'll remind you t'just punch me in the face." Wow good.

But now that Knuckles mentioned it, the Venusaur leaned in closer to marvel at the smaller guy's face. "Wow, you do have big eyes. They're purple."

"OK. It's a deal. You can punch me in the face too. I don't mind."

See? This is exactly what friendship is about. Compromise and equality.

"I do and they are." he replied, blinking. "They're good at seeing stuff in the dark and not so great at dealing with really bright light. Super useful for treasure hunting, though. Your eyes are red. That's pretty bad ass - I bet you could glare real good. Like if you wanted to really glare at a guy? Red eyes would do a good job of that."

Way better than purple ones.

"I can't see in the dark, but that's the coolest thing anyone's ever said about my eyes."

You get a face nuzzle for that. Here is Vinnie nuzzling your face.

A face nuzzle? Not something Knuckles had ever really received before from a guy at a bar. But he'd learned over the years that many different peoples and cultures had ways of doing things that might seem odd and yet were to be respected. Not everyone shook hands. Some people nuzzled faces.

So he nuzzled Vinnie's face back. Enjoy that cold nose.

"...dang. You smell good."

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HAPPY NEW YEAR

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And they gazed deeply into one anothers eyes...

and made out (don't tell bulba)

(Or Goombella.) .. (Wait no she might be into it idk)