ihateplumbers (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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smash_logs2014-09-22 09:47 pm
ihateplumbers) wrote in smash_logs2014-09-22 09:47 pm
Netiquette is Not Supposed To Work Like That: Welcome To World 8 Rules
Who: Bowser and Students and Targets
What: Bowser teaches 'etiquette' but really it's not
Where: The Etiquette Classroom -- Now With Koopa Troop Laptops
When: Tuesday, Sept. 23rd.
Warnings: Literal Internet Trolling
A new semester, a new chance to learn about deportment at home and abroad, with your ever-gracious host, Bowser Koopa XIV.
And so, after a lengthy lecture based off of a 1995-era internet netiquette document, Bowser turned to his class. He stepped down off of his lecture dais (of course he stood up on a dais to lecture to people) and gestured to the laptops with turtle-shell designs on the backs of them.
"We're all aware of how important it is to know how to use correct internet 'netiquette' rules when composing emails or instant messages or text messages or video messages or voice messages or insert-word-here messages when on the internet. But I feel that the best way to gauge how well you know what those rules are is by being able to spot what you should not do. A Reverse-Psychology approach, if you will."
He coughed, then continued. "The laptops in front of you have been specially designed to send messages to volunteers who will pretend to be innocent, unsuspecting internet-citizens. Your task will be to send messages that attempt to break the rules of netiquette, and later, I will find out from those people you sent messages to how successful you were."
He walks over to a laptop and picks it up with one claw, and looks at it casually. "Don't worry, everyone is being assigned a special email address, tied to each individual laptop. And you won't know who is sending you any responses you may receive back; it will be censored out, so you won't have to worry about who is or isn't one of my volunteers. I have dozens of minions here with me."
Not that those two statements have anything to do with each other, but let's just pretend that they do.
"I'll be grading you all based off of the reports I get back from the volunteers, so make sure you do a good job."
He put the laptop back down on the table, and smiled at the class. "You may begin, and select Volunteer A, B, C, or D. Try contacting two or three, if you have time."
[SPECIAL NOTES:
- The volunteers are not actually volunteers at all. They are people Bowser hates whom he thinks will be easy targets. Whoops. Mario, Ishimaru, Hajime and Pit. Special Hajime note: Because he's a robo-racist, he's less trollable than the others, but 1. Bowser doesn't know that, and 2. Neither do your characters. Just be aware of that.
- The emails tied to each laptop are randomly generated but follow a pattern. They all seem like really bad email addresses that one of the other victims might have. Examples include birdboy420@angelworld.org, malecheerleader69@enthusiasm.tv, pastalover666@spaghetti.biz, aznboieyebrowz1999@hallwayz.mobi and so on. Feel free to come up with your own for the poor person that receives your trolling.
- Thanks to a magical computer virus that is activated by just opening the email, all emails sent to the unwitting targets must be responded to.
- All emails sent back will have XXXXXX in place of any identifying information. They're being pre-censored for you. So XXXXXXXX@XXXXXX in the header and XXXXXX XXXXXX instead of Hajime Tanaka in the signature.
- This is a lesson in trolling but if this turns into racist youtube comments levels of trolling, I'ma shut you down. I trust you all. But I'm saying it anyway.]
What: Bowser teaches 'etiquette' but really it's not
Where: The Etiquette Classroom -- Now With Koopa Troop Laptops
When: Tuesday, Sept. 23rd.
Warnings: Literal Internet Trolling
A new semester, a new chance to learn about deportment at home and abroad, with your ever-gracious host, Bowser Koopa XIV.
And so, after a lengthy lecture based off of a 1995-era internet netiquette document, Bowser turned to his class. He stepped down off of his lecture dais (of course he stood up on a dais to lecture to people) and gestured to the laptops with turtle-shell designs on the backs of them.
"We're all aware of how important it is to know how to use correct internet 'netiquette' rules when composing emails or instant messages or text messages or video messages or voice messages or insert-word-here messages when on the internet. But I feel that the best way to gauge how well you know what those rules are is by being able to spot what you should not do. A Reverse-Psychology approach, if you will."
He coughed, then continued. "The laptops in front of you have been specially designed to send messages to volunteers who will pretend to be innocent, unsuspecting internet-citizens. Your task will be to send messages that attempt to break the rules of netiquette, and later, I will find out from those people you sent messages to how successful you were."
He walks over to a laptop and picks it up with one claw, and looks at it casually. "Don't worry, everyone is being assigned a special email address, tied to each individual laptop. And you won't know who is sending you any responses you may receive back; it will be censored out, so you won't have to worry about who is or isn't one of my volunteers. I have dozens of minions here with me."
Not that those two statements have anything to do with each other, but let's just pretend that they do.
"I'll be grading you all based off of the reports I get back from the volunteers, so make sure you do a good job."
He put the laptop back down on the table, and smiled at the class. "You may begin, and select Volunteer A, B, C, or D. Try contacting two or three, if you have time."
[SPECIAL NOTES:
- The volunteers are not actually volunteers at all. They are people Bowser hates whom he thinks will be easy targets. Whoops. Mario, Ishimaru, Hajime and Pit. Special Hajime note: Because he's a robo-racist, he's less trollable than the others, but 1. Bowser doesn't know that, and 2. Neither do your characters. Just be aware of that.
- The emails tied to each laptop are randomly generated but follow a pattern. They all seem like really bad email addresses that one of the other victims might have. Examples include birdboy420@angelworld.org, malecheerleader69@enthusiasm.tv, pastalover666@spaghetti.biz, aznboieyebrowz1999@hallwayz.mobi and so on. Feel free to come up with your own for the poor person that receives your trolling.
- Thanks to a magical computer virus that is activated by just opening the email, all emails sent to the unwitting targets must be responded to.
- All emails sent back will have XXXXXX in place of any identifying information. They're being pre-censored for you. So XXXXXXXX@XXXXXX in the header and XXXXXX XXXXXX instead of Hajime Tanaka in the signature.
- This is a lesson in trolling but if this turns into racist youtube comments levels of trolling, I'ma shut you down. I trust you all. But I'm saying it anyway.]
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you turned a fun game into a lecture. BOOOORRRIIINNNG!
youre no fun! do you have any friends? i bet you dont since youre full of not fun things!
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Somehow I have managed to amass a number of friends, despite my best efforts to alienate everyone I know through masterful boredom tactics. What they see in me, I can't imagine, but I suppose that's their business.
What of you? I can only imagine you to be fairly lonely, at least at this particular moment, if you thought your best use of time was to engage me in a game of castigation.
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you sound like a grandma
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dictionaries are old and stinky so youre a grandma!
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I'd offer a few, but I suspect all I know is boring grandma games that would be far to odorous for your tastes.
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