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smash_logs2013-05-19 07:45 pm
tank_rockarms) wrote in smash_logs2013-05-19 07:45 pm
GHOST POKEMON ANGEL ROBOT
Who: Max and Sonny
What: Max tries to take Sonny out to eat in FDC on the second night he's back in town. Things go downhill quickly.
Where: Gilded Stockade Buffet
When: May 16th. BACKDATED TO BEFORE EGGMAN.
Warnings: Image heavy. And literally the worst song ever made in the entire world.
Welcome to The Gilded Stockade, the restaurant where everything is covered in gravy or cheese andthe points don't matter you can eat as much of it as you like.
"Are you ready to get your eat on?"
Sonny has been ready to get his eat on since he was still in the great wombegg at the beginning of time.
Hell yes, we've got brohugs.
Max can make Saved-by-the-Bell era eyeglasses appear out of nowhere.
Sunshine just kept them in his pocket.
The neckbeard stands for 'classy.'
"My pecs take up two seats."
SUDDENLY, A PROBLEM OCCURS PROBLEMATICALLY.
Sunshine, the peaceloving man that he is, tries diplomacy.
Noodlearms here appears to have made a tiny mistake.
Regular. Guy.
RACISM IS BAD, KIDS. MAKING UNVERIFIED ASSUMPTIONS IS BAD, KIDS. MAKING RACIST ASSUMPTIONS IS DOUBLE BAD, KIDS.
Regular. Guy. Arms.
Sunshine, again, with the oil of Olivier, attempts to assuage the restaurant worker's racist presumptions.
HE'S SO ANGRY HE TURNED INTO A MUPPET. A RACIST MUPPET. A RACIST MUPPET WITH ISSUES.
Major problems, bro.
MORAL: That guy over there could be a pokemon and you wouldn't even know. Not even a little bit.
With a capital "D," Sunshine. With a capital D.
I can't foresee any negative outcomes to this at all.
Sonny's jaw is so goddamned manly, that punching it caused Tad's noodlearms to rotate into the center of his chest. BADASS.
It's at this point that I realized that the best I can hope for in life is to be Sonny Moe.
That's probably all full of Snorlax sweat. Gross.
THE RACIST BUFFET POSSE IS HERE TO HELP OUT. With LADLEWOMAN and PRINGLES CHIPS GUY and TONGS THE BARBARIAN to help even out the score.
Oh. That's probably less effective than she was hoping.
Up for some fisticuffs, are we, Pringles Man? Maximilian will show you what's for, bully.
(Also: Re: Paps - It keeps happening)
WE ALREADY EXPLAINED THIS, TAD. MAXIMILIAN IS THE HUMAN. WERE YOU EVEN PAYING ATTENTION?
Maximilian sort of learned Bulk Up on his own.
Oh no, Older Pete, now with longer hair and a goatee, launches a PAP SQUARED attack at Sunshine! WHATEVER WILL SUNSHINE DO???
Oh okay that probably works.
My thoughts exactly, Tongs. My thoughts exactly.
CHEESE IT, IT'S THE COPS.
But Maximilian, because he's Lawful Stupid, decides that he'll be Arrested on Principle.
Sunshine goes along with it. Bros before resisting arrest.
This is going up all over the Intertubes, you know it.what the hell is wrong with the guy on the right
Thankfully, embedded with the police was an MNN (Mushroom News Network, bringing you the latest and most exciting news since Princessgate 1995; we were THERE at KARTSPLOSION 2002) news crew, doing a LIVE REPORT about how terrible FDC has gotten recently. (Wherever there's trouble, you know to look for Toaderson Cooper). They were there to catch the arrest.
You probably saw it like 27 times as they replayed it over and over and over again and had a bunch of talking heats bloviate about it for the better part of the evening.
Sonny: Tell that guy I punched I only did it because he threw a chair at me!
Max: I'm bein' arrested 'cause some guy thought I was a pokemon and punched my friend in the face. I ain't a pokemon, I'm a human. But there ain't nothin' wrong with bein' a pokemon. Sonny's a pokemon. Lots of people are pokemon. I been a pokemon like five times.
Sonny: Usually he's a just a regular guy with big arms.
Max: Everybody should be able to eat all they can eat at the all you can eat buffet, no matter who you are – human guys with big arms, pokemon, angel, robot, ghost or pokemon ghost or angel robot or ghost pokemon angel robot. Or the regular kind of ghost with the sheet and the party hat. Whatever you want.
Sonny: Oh gosh, Red, I'm so sorry. I'll wait for you on the inside.
Jim has such a cute accent
It was, of course, only a short while later until Mewtube was full of remixes of this. The next morning, the very famous and popular Grotle Brothers, famous founders of Automatically Tune the Newscast, got their hands on it and it went VIRAL.Nothing about what is below is good. I don't know how to autotune. I don't know how to make videos. I don't know how to do anything. Don't watch the thing below. Just don't do it. I tried way too hard and it sounds just absolutely hideous. Jim's better than me.
And so, our brave heroes are spending the night in the clink. They'll get out on bail late in the day on the 17th, but THEY'RE JAILBIRDS UNTIL THEN. INTERNET FAMOUS JAILBIRDS.
Max, bro, how do you feel about this, bro?
Yeah, me too, bro. Me, too.
((REACT BELOW (IC, OOC) OR GO VISIT IN THE JAILS, WHATEVS.))
What: Max tries to take Sonny out to eat in FDC on the second night he's back in town. Things go downhill quickly.
Where: Gilded Stockade Buffet
When: May 16th. BACKDATED TO BEFORE EGGMAN.
Warnings: Image heavy. And literally the worst song ever made in the entire world.
Welcome to The Gilded Stockade, the restaurant where everything is covered in gravy or cheese and
"Are you ready to get your eat on?"
Sonny has been ready to get his eat on since he was still in the great wombegg at the beginning of time.
Hell yes, we've got brohugs.
Max can make Saved-by-the-Bell era eyeglasses appear out of nowhere.
Sunshine just kept them in his pocket.
The neckbeard stands for 'classy.'
"My pecs take up two seats."
SUDDENLY, A PROBLEM OCCURS PROBLEMATICALLY.
Sunshine, the peaceloving man that he is, tries diplomacy.
Noodlearms here appears to have made a tiny mistake.
Regular. Guy.
RACISM IS BAD, KIDS. MAKING UNVERIFIED ASSUMPTIONS IS BAD, KIDS. MAKING RACIST ASSUMPTIONS IS DOUBLE BAD, KIDS.
Regular. Guy. Arms.
Sunshine, again, with the oil of Olivier, attempts to assuage the restaurant worker's racist presumptions.
HE'S SO ANGRY HE TURNED INTO A MUPPET. A RACIST MUPPET. A RACIST MUPPET WITH ISSUES.
Major problems, bro.
MORAL: That guy over there could be a pokemon and you wouldn't even know. Not even a little bit.
With a capital "D," Sunshine. With a capital D.
I can't foresee any negative outcomes to this at all.
Sonny's jaw is so goddamned manly, that punching it caused Tad's noodlearms to rotate into the center of his chest. BADASS.
It's at this point that I realized that the best I can hope for in life is to be Sonny Moe.
That's probably all full of Snorlax sweat. Gross.
THE RACIST BUFFET POSSE IS HERE TO HELP OUT. With LADLEWOMAN and PRINGLES CHIPS GUY and TONGS THE BARBARIAN to help even out the score.
Oh. That's probably less effective than she was hoping.
Up for some fisticuffs, are we, Pringles Man? Maximilian will show you what's for, bully.
(Also: Re: Paps - It keeps happening)
WE ALREADY EXPLAINED THIS, TAD. MAXIMILIAN IS THE HUMAN. WERE YOU EVEN PAYING ATTENTION?
Maximilian sort of learned Bulk Up on his own.
Oh no, Older Pete, now with longer hair and a goatee, launches a PAP SQUARED attack at Sunshine! WHATEVER WILL SUNSHINE DO???
Oh okay that probably works.
My thoughts exactly, Tongs. My thoughts exactly.
CHEESE IT, IT'S THE COPS.
But Maximilian, because he's Lawful Stupid, decides that he'll be Arrested on Principle.
Sunshine goes along with it. Bros before resisting arrest.
This is going up all over the Intertubes, you know it.
Thankfully, embedded with the police was an MNN (Mushroom News Network, bringing you the latest and most exciting news since Princessgate 1995; we were THERE at KARTSPLOSION 2002) news crew, doing a LIVE REPORT about how terrible FDC has gotten recently. (Wherever there's trouble, you know to look for Toaderson Cooper). They were there to catch the arrest.
You probably saw it like 27 times as they replayed it over and over and over again and had a bunch of talking heats bloviate about it for the better part of the evening.
Sonny: Tell that guy I punched I only did it because he threw a chair at me!
Max: I'm bein' arrested 'cause some guy thought I was a pokemon and punched my friend in the face. I ain't a pokemon, I'm a human. But there ain't nothin' wrong with bein' a pokemon. Sonny's a pokemon. Lots of people are pokemon. I been a pokemon like five times.
Sonny: Usually he's a just a regular guy with big arms.
Max: Everybody should be able to eat all they can eat at the all you can eat buffet, no matter who you are – human guys with big arms, pokemon, angel, robot, ghost or pokemon ghost or angel robot or ghost pokemon angel robot. Or the regular kind of ghost with the sheet and the party hat. Whatever you want.
Sonny: Oh gosh, Red, I'm so sorry. I'll wait for you on the inside.
It was, of course, only a short while later until Mewtube was full of remixes of this. The next morning, the very famous and popular Grotle Brothers, famous founders of Automatically Tune the Newscast, got their hands on it and it went VIRAL.
And so, our brave heroes are spending the night in the clink. They'll get out on bail late in the day on the 17th, but THEY'RE JAILBIRDS UNTIL THEN. INTERNET FAMOUS JAILBIRDS.
Max, bro, how do you feel about this, bro?
Yeah, me too, bro. Me, too.
((REACT BELOW (IC, OOC) OR GO VISIT IN THE JAILS, WHATEVS.))
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...they probably let her in with it because of how pathetic it looked.]
Hey guys! [Wink.] I--
[Waaaait a minute. These bars are barely large enough to properly hold Sonny, let alone Max. She could easily punch them away with a little bit of fire, no need for the large file nail she stuffed inside the cake at all...]
---Oh. [She does not explain her oh.]
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Sasha! I'm so sorry that I'm here but thanks for coming to see us, I...
[And then he saw the cake and he stopped talking and just... stared.]
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::Max is staring at the cake that, really, isn't on his diet but he's NOT GETTING ANY OTHER DINNER so cake it is.::
Can you, like... squish half of that through the bars for Sonny and the other half for me?
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[GRAAAARGHLE GRARGHLE - that is the noise his stomach is making.]
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[She just needs to run outside and throw the pieces of metal inside there out.]
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Sorry for the wait!
[It took a while for them to let her in again.]
...they wouldn't let me come in with utensils.
[Sorry guys. Also thinking back she's REALLY glad they didn't catch her with those metal filers. What had she been thinking?]
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[Oh man oh gosh oh man - He has the coolest sister.]
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[With the warden behind her still watching, she passes the food through, the rice held together as onigiri. Passing the cake without it touching the bars is a challenge in itself.]
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::Max has a steak in his teeth and two more in his hands. He's sort of busy at the moment, but he looks thankful::
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Thank you, Sasha. And thank you Warden for letting my sister bring us some food. That was very nice of you.