Char (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rivalkidneypunch) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
smash_logs2012-12-05 05:42 pm
rivalkidneypunch) wrote in smash_logs2012-12-05 05:42 pm
Pokemon Studies 1
Who: Char and YOU. Yes, you. The one with the face.
What: Pokemon Studies class.
Where: A CLASSROOM.
When: December 5. I don't care if it doesn't make sense for a class to start in December. WE'RE A SCHOOL RUN BY GIANT TALKING HANDS.
Warnings: Char is Char and will probably be a potty mouth.
[If you signed up for this class, then you must really be interested in Pokemon. Considering what kind of student Char was, one can only imagine how he's gonna be as a teacher. It might be interesting to note that he hasn't bothered to bring out the gijinka form as his students file in; it's definitely a fuck-off huge orange dragon chilling out up at the front of the room.
Once the bell rings and everyone's all seated, he gives his tail a good, loud smack against the floor to get the class' attention, then... starts talking in rumbly dragon-noises. If you don't understand poglespeak, you might be confused. If you happen to be fluent in poglepseak, though, then you'd be able to follow:]
If you can understand me right now, you're lucky. Next class, we're startin' with a pop quiz on Pokemon types. You can find type charts anywhere online, so study up.
[Luckily for the general population, though, he doesn't plan on teaching the entire class that way. With a sudden poof, he switches over to human form. Be grateful he's not one of the folks who's naked when they switch forms.]
Alright, let's get the basic shit outta the way. For those of you who don't know me, the name's Char. This classroom's my territory. I run the show here. Skip class, draw dicks on all your tests, what the fuck ever: I don't care. But if you interrupt me, backsass me, or otherwise fuck with my class, then I slap you with my tail. I don't give two shits whether you study or not, but I'm a Charizard, and I'm gonna demand respect like one.
Second of all: even if the field's friggin' called Pokemon Studies, there's a huge human-centric bias in the literature out there. Most of this shit comes from humans -- Pokemon professors, dipshit kids with Pokedexes, and assholes studyin' their own domesticated stock inside cozy little daycares. That ain't quite how this class is gonna go. I ain't no poke-prof: If you wanna learn about gym leaders and how to get your trainer license and shit, then you got other places you can look. I'm a friggin' Pokemon, so I'm teachin' a pokecentric class.
I'm startin' you assholes off light, so be grateful: ain't gonna be a full lecture today. Pick up a sheet at the front here, fill it out, and you're free to go. That's it.
[Char flicks a wing over at a stack of papers on a table at the front of the room, then ambles on back to his own big fancy teacher desk, where he sits down with his feet propped up. He's done talkin' for now, folks. Nothing left to do but have at that sheet:]
What: Pokemon Studies class.
Where: A CLASSROOM.
When: December 5. I don't care if it doesn't make sense for a class to start in December. WE'RE A SCHOOL RUN BY GIANT TALKING HANDS.
Warnings: Char is Char and will probably be a potty mouth.
[If you signed up for this class, then you must really be interested in Pokemon. Considering what kind of student Char was, one can only imagine how he's gonna be as a teacher. It might be interesting to note that he hasn't bothered to bring out the gijinka form as his students file in; it's definitely a fuck-off huge orange dragon chilling out up at the front of the room.
Once the bell rings and everyone's all seated, he gives his tail a good, loud smack against the floor to get the class' attention, then... starts talking in rumbly dragon-noises. If you don't understand poglespeak, you might be confused. If you happen to be fluent in poglepseak, though, then you'd be able to follow:]
If you can understand me right now, you're lucky. Next class, we're startin' with a pop quiz on Pokemon types. You can find type charts anywhere online, so study up.
[Luckily for the general population, though, he doesn't plan on teaching the entire class that way. With a sudden poof, he switches over to human form. Be grateful he's not one of the folks who's naked when they switch forms.]
Alright, let's get the basic shit outta the way. For those of you who don't know me, the name's Char. This classroom's my territory. I run the show here. Skip class, draw dicks on all your tests, what the fuck ever: I don't care. But if you interrupt me, backsass me, or otherwise fuck with my class, then I slap you with my tail. I don't give two shits whether you study or not, but I'm a Charizard, and I'm gonna demand respect like one.
Second of all: even if the field's friggin' called Pokemon Studies, there's a huge human-centric bias in the literature out there. Most of this shit comes from humans -- Pokemon professors, dipshit kids with Pokedexes, and assholes studyin' their own domesticated stock inside cozy little daycares. That ain't quite how this class is gonna go. I ain't no poke-prof: If you wanna learn about gym leaders and how to get your trainer license and shit, then you got other places you can look. I'm a friggin' Pokemon, so I'm teachin' a pokecentric class.
I'm startin' you assholes off light, so be grateful: ain't gonna be a full lecture today. Pick up a sheet at the front here, fill it out, and you're free to go. That's it.
[Char flicks a wing over at a stack of papers on a table at the front of the room, then ambles on back to his own big fancy teacher desk, where he sits down with his feet propped up. He's done talkin' for now, folks. Nothing left to do but have at that sheet:]
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Species: Human
How familiar are you with Pokemon?: Not very
Why are you interested in this class?: Learn more about 'em
Are there any species you especially want to learn about?: ...ghost and water types?
Are there any other Pokemon-relevant areas you want to learn about?: Forming contacts with Pokemon.
Is there any stupid medical bullshit that will prevent you from participating in fieldwork? No?
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Let's also pretend he wrote Michel in that name part because I suck
Used to doing it with demons normally...just wondered if it's possible with Pokemon as well.
Hmmm...maybe Michel should explain...Demons have different personalities! Depending on how you act around them, they might be either scared, angry, eager or happy! If you make them eager or happy, they'll form a contact with you and give you items and cards the next time you meet them.
Did that make sense?
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[The hell is this guy's problem.]
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Just keep pattin' yourself on the back, Super Great Friend. See how far that attitude gets you here.
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[And you used a terrible way to explain it and show it off, good job.]
If you don't that's just one thing less to learn!
[Indoor voice, clearly.]
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[Ha ha whoops is this kind of a sensitive subject, Char? LOOKS LIKE IT.]
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[They are agreeing which would probably work better if he wasn't yelling.]
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[HA HA TOO LATE. Terrible first impressions are go.]
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[They'll get along like cats and dogs.]
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Sit. Yelling isn't conducive for debates and quite frankly you both have attitudes right now.
[It was in her "sit the fuck down" voice.]
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For what it was worth, though, he said nothing. Eikichi and Blue each received a look in turn, then he just turned and walked back to his fancy-pants teacher desk.]
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What's his problem...
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AT LEAST EVERYBODY SAT DOWN.]
You used a somewhat poor example to illustrate your point.
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...yeah probably.
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...
Suppose it's not giving a good example to the others.
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Admittedly stepping in was probably just as bad, but I'll deal with that on my own.
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It comes with the territory.
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Good point.
[> YOUR SOCIAL LINK WITH EIKICHI HAS REACHED ANOTHER RANK BLA BLA BLA BLA.]