Char (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rivalkidneypunch) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
smash_logs2012-12-05 05:42 pm
rivalkidneypunch) wrote in smash_logs2012-12-05 05:42 pm
Pokemon Studies 1
Who: Char and YOU. Yes, you. The one with the face.
What: Pokemon Studies class.
Where: A CLASSROOM.
When: December 5. I don't care if it doesn't make sense for a class to start in December. WE'RE A SCHOOL RUN BY GIANT TALKING HANDS.
Warnings: Char is Char and will probably be a potty mouth.
[If you signed up for this class, then you must really be interested in Pokemon. Considering what kind of student Char was, one can only imagine how he's gonna be as a teacher. It might be interesting to note that he hasn't bothered to bring out the gijinka form as his students file in; it's definitely a fuck-off huge orange dragon chilling out up at the front of the room.
Once the bell rings and everyone's all seated, he gives his tail a good, loud smack against the floor to get the class' attention, then... starts talking in rumbly dragon-noises. If you don't understand poglespeak, you might be confused. If you happen to be fluent in poglepseak, though, then you'd be able to follow:]
If you can understand me right now, you're lucky. Next class, we're startin' with a pop quiz on Pokemon types. You can find type charts anywhere online, so study up.
[Luckily for the general population, though, he doesn't plan on teaching the entire class that way. With a sudden poof, he switches over to human form. Be grateful he's not one of the folks who's naked when they switch forms.]
Alright, let's get the basic shit outta the way. For those of you who don't know me, the name's Char. This classroom's my territory. I run the show here. Skip class, draw dicks on all your tests, what the fuck ever: I don't care. But if you interrupt me, backsass me, or otherwise fuck with my class, then I slap you with my tail. I don't give two shits whether you study or not, but I'm a Charizard, and I'm gonna demand respect like one.
Second of all: even if the field's friggin' called Pokemon Studies, there's a huge human-centric bias in the literature out there. Most of this shit comes from humans -- Pokemon professors, dipshit kids with Pokedexes, and assholes studyin' their own domesticated stock inside cozy little daycares. That ain't quite how this class is gonna go. I ain't no poke-prof: If you wanna learn about gym leaders and how to get your trainer license and shit, then you got other places you can look. I'm a friggin' Pokemon, so I'm teachin' a pokecentric class.
I'm startin' you assholes off light, so be grateful: ain't gonna be a full lecture today. Pick up a sheet at the front here, fill it out, and you're free to go. That's it.
[Char flicks a wing over at a stack of papers on a table at the front of the room, then ambles on back to his own big fancy teacher desk, where he sits down with his feet propped up. He's done talkin' for now, folks. Nothing left to do but have at that sheet:]
What: Pokemon Studies class.
Where: A CLASSROOM.
When: December 5. I don't care if it doesn't make sense for a class to start in December. WE'RE A SCHOOL RUN BY GIANT TALKING HANDS.
Warnings: Char is Char and will probably be a potty mouth.
[If you signed up for this class, then you must really be interested in Pokemon. Considering what kind of student Char was, one can only imagine how he's gonna be as a teacher. It might be interesting to note that he hasn't bothered to bring out the gijinka form as his students file in; it's definitely a fuck-off huge orange dragon chilling out up at the front of the room.
Once the bell rings and everyone's all seated, he gives his tail a good, loud smack against the floor to get the class' attention, then... starts talking in rumbly dragon-noises. If you don't understand poglespeak, you might be confused. If you happen to be fluent in poglepseak, though, then you'd be able to follow:]
If you can understand me right now, you're lucky. Next class, we're startin' with a pop quiz on Pokemon types. You can find type charts anywhere online, so study up.
[Luckily for the general population, though, he doesn't plan on teaching the entire class that way. With a sudden poof, he switches over to human form. Be grateful he's not one of the folks who's naked when they switch forms.]
Alright, let's get the basic shit outta the way. For those of you who don't know me, the name's Char. This classroom's my territory. I run the show here. Skip class, draw dicks on all your tests, what the fuck ever: I don't care. But if you interrupt me, backsass me, or otherwise fuck with my class, then I slap you with my tail. I don't give two shits whether you study or not, but I'm a Charizard, and I'm gonna demand respect like one.
Second of all: even if the field's friggin' called Pokemon Studies, there's a huge human-centric bias in the literature out there. Most of this shit comes from humans -- Pokemon professors, dipshit kids with Pokedexes, and assholes studyin' their own domesticated stock inside cozy little daycares. That ain't quite how this class is gonna go. I ain't no poke-prof: If you wanna learn about gym leaders and how to get your trainer license and shit, then you got other places you can look. I'm a friggin' Pokemon, so I'm teachin' a pokecentric class.
I'm startin' you assholes off light, so be grateful: ain't gonna be a full lecture today. Pick up a sheet at the front here, fill it out, and you're free to go. That's it.
[Char flicks a wing over at a stack of papers on a table at the front of the room, then ambles on back to his own big fancy teacher desk, where he sits down with his feet propped up. He's done talkin' for now, folks. Nothing left to do but have at that sheet:]