irritated avians

[planking]

Who: YOU
What: ANGRY BIRDS
Where: EVERYWHERE
When: TODAY
Warnings: PROPERTY DAMAGE

It's a nice, breezy day; a welcome change from August's sweltering heat. Fall is on the way, and with it come migrating birds.

Lots of birds.

Oh my dear sweet lord where are all these birds coming from.

Birds of all shapes and sizes. Some of them land harmlessly on the ground, others bonk into buildings, trees, bushes, you.

Some of them are exploding. You might wanna watch out for that. And hide the bacon, I hear they're not fond of pigs.

Comments

[planking]

All throughout this marvelous feat of nature Flint can be found trying to shoo the birds away before they knock/blow any more holes into things. Give him a hand?

[will_be_god]

Cyrus had been working to eliminate the threat. Nothing else had worked, and thus force was the sole remaining resort. But there was another fighting them who hadn't seemed to pick up on that yet.

"Simply urging them to leave will not work. Surely your dog will be able to fight them."

[planking]

"You know they explode, right?" Flint balked at the suggestion. "I'm not lettin' my dog anywhere near these things."

[trustycrowbar]

Gordon is on his way back from a weather station near the city. It had said it might rain today.

Maybe he needed to calibrate it to be more specific, because now he's suddenly swerving, in that flying car of his, to dodge a hail of pissed-off kamikaze avians. It's good he can drive well, between the birds and the small explosions that border the road and occasionally send up showers of dirt and asphalt. Those who listen carefully as he zips by might hear him yelling a tirade about lift-to-drag ratios and the idiocy of birds evolving to explode.

No one else got caught in the rain, did they? If so, wanna lift?

[magicdancer]

Funny you should mention that. Because there were some birds flying around. Sideways. After being whipped by the magic ponytail of a certain annoyed half genie, who found her personal space quickly being violated by this fowl presence.

[trustycrowbar]

Lol fowl presence. Gordon ducks in the retrofitted Charger as a purple sandbag-burd bounces of the hood, and follows its strange trajectory to the purple-haired girl taking a stand against the wildlife.

"--Shantae!"

He wrenches the hovercar around and lets it spin to a stop near the trees nearby, standing out of his seat. He isn't sure

"What're you doing out here?!"

[givemeyouranswerdo]

How did this keep happening? Not this specific bird attack, just... all this insanity in general? And yet where others might have seen disaster... Daisy saw opportunity.

The school under attack? She would rise to its defense.

With a baseball bat.

Dressed for sports, and wielding her favourite bat, Daisy set out and started to wallop away anything that dared to come her way.

[kumagypsy]

Kumatora's immense psychic abilities were tingling. That meant that SOMEBODY... was about to hit things with a baseball bat. She had to investigate!

But first, she had to look the part.

"Yo, somebody didn't invite me to the bird bashing party!"

[givemeyouranswerdo]

"Oh, how rude of me," Daisy said with a grin, hitting a home run with a red bird ball. "There's plenty around, c'mon! I bet I can hit more than you!"

[babylonmechanic]

THEY WERE TURNING ON THEIR OWN.

Wave swerved about on her Gear, between falling death birds, wondering just what someone here obviously did to earn this kind of reprisal. Where the heck were Zero and Fefnir? Hell, she'd settle for Sonic and Tails about now!

[vela_nova]

Blaze was enjoying reading outdoors, when a bird the approximate size of a soccer ball landed, leaving a crater right by her feet. That was quickly followed by other birds. More and more of them, raining death and destruction from above.

Blaze was confident in her ability to defend herself, but if they were under attack... She had to find the others.

[iamtheeggman]

Dr. Eggman had a problem. After the attack on his Egg Carrier, he was left short a flying fortress, not to mention short an army. He had a few minions remaining, but nowhere near enough to be the threat he once was. He had to get back into construction mode, and fast.

How fortunate for him that the skies opened up and started raining woodland creatures, ripe for turning into a new army of robot minions.

He quickly retrofitted his Eggmobile, with a vacuum attachment and a huge heavy duty bag. The plan was simple: Catch as many of these angry birds as possible, dump them into Prison Eggs, fire up his badnik assembly line, and voila, instant robot army! Look out world, Dr. Eggman is BACK!

[will_be_god]

Initially, Cyrus studied them. Their properties varied wildly from bird to bird--and even that term he used tentatively, as they bore only the vaguest resemblance to avians.

But they only desired to fight. They were violent beasts, and could only understand one thing. If they were determined to wage war, Cyrus would combat them.

[tempus_fixit]

Don't ask how she'd wound up in this situation, but Lucca was up in the school clock tower with a radioantenna, one potato, an alarm clock, two half-silvered mirrors and roughly one-half of an electric engine when the whole tower itself shudders from impact.

"What...?"

She does probably the least-intelligent thing a brainiac like her can do: she goes out onto the balconied clock face to investigate. What follows next is a very dangerous, and slightly bizarre, variant of dodgeball as the avian projectiles crash through the flimsy clock face and she leaps out of the path.

"YAAAAAH!"

[itsjustrats]

It's Lucca's lucky day, because somehow she's not the only one up in the clock tower. A hand reaches out and grabs her by the collar, pulling her back inside and away from the bird barrage.

[tempus_fixit]

WHERE DID HE COME FROM? Okay, no, nevermind, she's just glad he's there! She clings to the hand and scrambles awkwardly back onto the ledge and through the hole in the clock tower face, panting.

"Thanks! I wasn't going to handle a fall like that. Note to self; pack a parachute next time."

There's another crash, and she recoils back a few steps, her eyes on the distended glass. "What's going on here?!"

[rivalthunderbolts]

It was an ordinary day for Jolt. He was curling up in his dorm, reading his tablet, listening to music on his headphones, and waiting for the two jumbo meat lovers pizzas he ordered to arrive. That's when he heard a loud THUD. He looked up from his tablet, sliding his headphones off, looking at the window. Another THUD. He got up off the bed to investigate...

And then CRASH, the window shattered as a small yellow bird fired through it like a rocket! What the fuck?!

Hopefully this wouldn't hinder the arrival of his pizzas.

Also hopefully everyone would be okay.

[thishereismonapizza]

Hindering the arrival of those delicious, juicy meat pizzas were exactly on the agenda to those mischievous yet irritated birds. In fact, our intrepid pizza delivery girl was having a hard time with them outside on the grounds of the academy. Swooping in to come crashing at her feet, narrowly knocking the boxes of pizzas out of her hand. What beef did these avians have to pick with her? Not like there was chicken on these pizzas anyways. Just bacon, bacon, and even more bacon. With a sprinkling of ham.

A sudden shriek eroded out of the depths of Mona's mouth as a round, red bird collided into Mona's shoulder, narrowly causing her to drop the precious, meaty cargo to the tarmac. When would these birds let up? They'd been following her ever since she left her pizzeria down in the FDC. Even with her pair of roller blades on for a speedy delivery couldn't shake these feathered fiends.

"W-what did I ever do to you guys? Shoo!" she yelled, cowering body over the boxes and protecting them as if they were worth a pretty hefty sum of gold. No way over her dead body was she going to let her customer's pizzas fall pray to such a fate as a bird attack.

[rivalthunderbolts]

Jolt took a look out of the dorm window, keeping her eye open for any sight of Mona (and his pizzas). He knew she could take care of herself, but even he thought this was some kind of bullshit. He had to make sure she (and the pizzas) were safe.

Mona's shriek quickly drew Jolt's eyes towards the gates. There was the unmistakable sight of Daisy Mona. And she was under attack!

FUCK THAT NOISE.

Jolt bolted out of his room and made for the door. Like hell was anyone hurting HIS friends (or his pizzas)! He shifted to Jolteon form and dashed in her direction, sparking as he ran and ready to unleash some lightning.

[megabuster]

BIRBS. BIRB BALLS EVERYWHERE. Wherever they were coming from, Rock knew that if his friends were under attack, he would be there to help. He didn't want to kill any of these things, despite how much damage they were causing, but maybe there was something he could do to contain them...

Quickly, Rock suited up into Mega Man, and set off to work.

[drawin_on_trees]

Roomie. ROOMIE. Where are you going in your cool battle armor. Skull Kid wasn't about to miss out on this. He didn't have any cool suit-up montages, but he was running after Rock nonetheless.

[megabuster]

It didn't take long for Rock to realize he had a shadow tailing him, and he glanced behind him at Skull Kid. "You should take cover! It's dangerous out here!" he shouted, just barely noticing a bird about to clock his roommate on the back of the head. He dove for Skull Kid, tackling him out of harm's way as the bird left a crater in the pavement where he once stood.

[travelingbelle]

There were so many birbs.

Blue had never seen the like of them before. And so, naturally, being the ace trainer she was, there was only one thing to do.

Lob some balls at the balls of birbs and see what happened.

[itsjustrats]

See, Garrett's idea was a little more... violent.

But as it turns out, it was only going to be an idea, because as he notched an arrow and was lining up a shot, a little ball thing him on the head.

"..." He made a grumbly-sigh noise. "Can you watch where you're tossing those things?

[travelingbelle]

How did Blue know where Garrett was? Was it her Mightyena's keen nose? Was it intuition? Oooeeooo.

"Not if you're going to shoot the birds I'm trying to catch!"