smash_logs | are we in a magical fairy tale land?

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are we in a magical fairy tale land?

Who: Clear && YOU!
What: A meteor crashes into the academy and brings along with it... life. Is it an alien?!
Where: The woods just outside of campus grounds.
When: March 7th, late at night.
Warnings: Depends on who joins in! It's Clear, though, so this may be a wild ride.

CC: crystalclear@platinumjail.org
From: xxx@xxx.xxx
Subject: Wondrous meteor Krazy Kruise package!

MSG: HELLO HELLO!
For some reason unknown to neither man nor animal, maybe even the manimals, you are our very first participant in the KRAZY KRUISE ORDER PACKAGE to Smashing Academy Terrorization Institute! Terrorizing all of mankind with strange doodads and billybobs and whatever you can imagine! Harmless terrorizing, I promise. Most of the time.

WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?! Look what we have planned for you!

● A ONE-WAY TICKET TO FINAL DESTINATION CITY BY METEOR! Impress your friends and family with the travel ticket of a LIFETIME!
● FREE TUITION PAYMENTS FOR LIFE! (We kind of already have that anyway, but it's still REALLY COOL.)
● FREE FOOD. FREE HOUSING. DO I NEED TO SAY MORE. OF COURSE I DON'T!
● ACTUALLY, we can give you a free pet upon arrival. Very rotund, very orange, so much yes, and so little size.
● LEARN HOW TO MAKE SMOOTHIES AND APPRECIATE GOTHIC ARCHITECTURE, maybe learn how to destroy things in the meantime.
● ... AND SO MUCH MORE!

What are you waiting for?! I DON'T KNOW, BUT I KNOW WE'RE WAITING. Waiting for you. Touching you... touching me... touching you...

So began the journey of one android incubated inside of an asteroid of minute proportions. ( Compared to other asteroids, at least. We don't need to almost burn the whole forest down. AGAIN. ) A state of sleep induced into his robotic body — how did Crazy Hand even know to do that? — he hurtled for solid ground at rapid speed, energy of unknown substance and power encasing the hunk of space rock to prevent too much outside damage. ( Honestly, it just prevented a fire. Who cared about whatever else it did? ) Eyes fluttered open just before collision, confused and dazed, for he'd hardly even recalled boarding the craft, yet here he was at top speed.

CRASH!

"Wah—!" Plop. A lump of... someone rolled out of an implanted hatch, landing in a crumpled heap on the grass. With animals scattering and screaming for their lives, the scene was total havoc, yet Clear lied in its midst, face-down and befuddled.

What just happened? Who was this guy, moaning and groaning on the floor? Why was he hardly injured from such a rough ride? Was that an orange on his head? Where did that come from? Flyers for Flat Zone Building Services on the ground? What was this?

This probably... needed to be investigated. Are you a bad enough dude to take that chance and approach the weird alien gas mask guy?

( IMPORTANT NOTE that there will not be separate threads for this log! Considering the circumstances, this will be a multiple person log with whoever wants to investigate, run into each other, and ultimately aid and/or kick the robot in the shin. All events will happen as one expanse of time. For that reason, I recommend tracking the thread if you post! Track it! Press the little box up there! It's a nice box! )

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Sometimes? Sonny Moe just liked to sleep outside.

Well, truthfully, being on the Egg Carrier as it was going down had not been a super awesome experience for him. In fact, nothing about that day had been great. And he was taking some time out to be by himself and alone with his thoughts to work through it all. Plus he had a huge stash of non-perishable food items hidden under a stump out here. What more of a reason did he need to take a night away from the school and sleep under the stars?

A Pokéflute was the easiest way to wake a sleeping Snorlax. Any ten year old from Kanto can tell you that. A slightly less known method for waking them is an asteroid of any size brutally ploughing the ground nearby. Sonny, already dreaming about flames and screaming metal and large things falling from the heavens, was none too happy to find that at least some of that was going on in the world of the waking as well. He awoke with a startled bellow, jumped onto his feet (Further abusing poor Mother Earth with the rapid shifting of his massive bulk.) and almost ran away. Almost. BUT WAIT.

Was that a guy spilling out of the space-rock? Wait, almost as importantly, did he bring an orange!?

Enquiring ~~stomachs~~ minds had to know.

He scooched forward along the grass, ready to bolt if more asteroids became apparent on the horizon, and sniffed at this boy's light hair.

Clear was in an absolute daze, head spinning like a crazed Hitmontop at mach speed. He swore his eyes were spinning in their sockets, and that they were sure to fall out at any minute. Rest in peace, little android, and see you, space cowboy.

Actually, he was just fine. He just... kind of had to get his bearings. Wait, but what's this? That loud sound of sniffling, the noise identifiable as a beast searching for sustenance, the familiar dread of being eaten by a big, scary dog...

No. Forget getting his bearings. He had to move. His bobbing head, swaying from his descent, lifted to catch sight of... whatever monstrosity was taking a whiff of him. At first, he'd presumed the worst — a huge, terrifying pooch looking for lunch — but that was not what he got. Heavens, no.

What he got was so much worse. Worse than the worst.

It was a giant, scary cat thing.

"U— uwaaAAAHHH!" With an ear-piercing screech, he reeled back and scrambled on his behind, scooting for the meteor in search of safety. Once his back reached rock, he just sat there, watching in horror as the creature went about its business, his orange abandoned where he'd once fallen.

"Scary! So scary! Please don't eat me!" He reached for a stick and started swatting it in self-defense. It wasn't long enough to reach Sonny, but it'd hopefully keep him from thinking he was a tasty meal!

Whoa - this guy was kind of a scaredy Meowth, huh? Sonny figured that maybe they didn't have Snorlaxes in space. He rolled back on his haunches and planted his butt into the grass at the edge of the impact crater. He watched as Clear picked up a stick and waved it at him. Man, did he really think a little stick like that would keep him safe? It wasn't like he was a Farfetch'd with a Leek or anything!

And what was that on his face? It reminded Sonny of a gas mask, like he'd seen on TV. Maybe it was, maybe it was something else. But it made the other guy's face hard to see. Maybe he was an alien and he couldn't breathe in Earth's oxygen rich atmosphere?

But there was time for boring stuff like that, later. The Snorlax leaned over and scooped up the orange.

"Lax-lax?"

Hello! Are you going to eat this?

Probably not, because then he'd have to take off the gas mask and expose himself to Earth's oxygen. Oh, and microbes!

It was only around then that Clear had gotten the message. Finally, he relinquished the stick, then lowering his hand shakily and slowly. The— The thing wasn't bothering him, instead sitting across from him to take his orange. Wasn't that his free pet from the person who sent him here?

"Ah! Please be careful!" He curled his knees to his chest and pointed at the fruit, seemingly like... well, like any old orange out there. It didn't seem to be alive, but he never fathomed that he'd see something like this here either. "Orange-san is very sensitive. He is my new friend, you know! The kind Krazy-san person gave him to me."

Was he going to eat him? Probably, and the idea of that was horrifying if it was still alive. Nature was so cruel and vicious... but at least he himself wasn't going to be the one on the Snorlax's dinner plate.

Orange-San?

Sonny looked the fruit over before shrugging his huge, round shoulders and very carefully setting it down in front of Clear. He didn't want to hurt it, if it had a name and this guy was worried about it. That would be mean just for the sake of being mean. He could live without an orange.

For now.

He smiled toothily at Clear before yawning widely. Now that he was a little more awake, he was starting to think more rationally. He should probably turn into a Human and check to make sure that there were no serious injuries sustained by this light haired star child.

POMPF!

"Hello!"

Suddenly: A Man.

"Haa—?" Well, he certainly hadn't expected such a shift! The terrifying beast who approached him so 'menacingly' before... was now a large, yet gentle human being. Clear, once horrified over whom had nearly devoured his fruity friend, had become curious. While not the same as him, he was very similar, hiding fake humanity behind the mask of something else... or was it backwards? Whatever the case, he felt plenty safer.

"Oh! Hello!" He perked up in a flash, scrambling to his feet with just a little stumble. Apart from residual shock from the situation, he was fit as a fiddle now. His first course of action was to take his orange pal and keep him safe in his lab coat, protected from the elements and... whatever else was in store.

"I'm very sorry, sir! It's just, you seemed very scary, and I didn't know if you would eat Orange-san! He's been given to me as a pet, so I have to protect him." He still didn't quite understand why, though. He seemed like a regular orange... but again, he felt he had no room to judge in a place like this.

"An orange is kind of a funny pet to have!" Sonny commented. "But that's OK - I'm not going to eat him! Promise!"

Well, Clear seemed to be up and around. And he wasn't on fire or bleeding or cradling a broken arm or even really upset about having crash landed in an asteroid. He must be some kind of space hero or something! An astronaut for whom this sort of thing was an everyday occurrence.

"I was going to ask if you were doing OK, but it looks like you're just fine, right? If you need me to, I can take you to see the nurse, though. Oh, and my name is Sonny Moe!"

He extended a hand for the other boy to shake.

The bewildered stare from behind his mask was more than indicative of Clear's confusion... hopefully. Not once had he ever shaken a hand before, nor did he understand the connotations behind it. Was this some sort of new, introductory greeting in this culture? Things sure were different from Japan, he thought, even in his lack of experience. ( If only he realized that handshaking, too, was coined in his region of the world... )

"Ah! I am Clear!" Without accepting the hand, he bowed, the only way he knew to respond actively. His motion was made steeply, given in honor of a new friend made, however rocky their start was. "I am doing just fine. Thank you very much for asking, Sonny-san! I am very delighted."

Lifting back to proper standing, he idly adjusted his mask on his face, keeping it firmly planted. He was not going to be removing that thing any time soon, and why would he? He was perfectly comfortable like this.

"I have no need to see a nurse. I am perfectly fit!" As if to display his invigoration and well-being, he gave a dainty twirl on one leg, lab coat swishing behind him. "See? Per~ fect~ ly~ fit~!"

Sonny watched Clear bow and wondered if he should do the same. He tried it and didn't quite make it as low as the android - he had a bit more tummy in the way than Clear did, obviously. Still. It was a good-faith effort.

"I'm so glad you're OK, Clear!" he replied, watching the other boy do a twirl. "I was worried! I didn't know anyone could fall out of the sky in a rock and not get hurt. Did it have a really good air-bag or something?"

Either that, or maybe Clear was just way stronger than he looked. That was a possibility, too.

"Even if you don't need to go to the nurse, maybe you should come to the school? We could at least find you somewhere to stay for the night so you won't have to sleep in the woods? Or is there somewhere in the city you want to go? Are you an alien???"

That last one was asked with all the curiosity he'd thus far kept in check.

"A... lien...?" The very word was foreign to him, or — dare it be said — alien to him. Why, there were a couple of terms in Sonny's rambling that he couldn't comprehend, alien included. What was an air-bag? Was it like a balloon? It sounded like a balloon.

"My name is not Alien," concluded Clear punctually, standing perfectly in place now with hands buried into his pockets. "My name is Clear. Who is this person called Alien? Does he look like this?" He pointed to his own gas mask. Surely, it wasn't the only one in existence, so he had to imagine he'd been mixed up for someone else.

"There is a school I am looking for," continued the android without any more than a beat, "called Smash Academy. Is that the school you are talking about, Sonny-san? I definitely need to go there! The Krazy Kruise person sent me here, but..." With a pause, he took in his surroundings, bushes and foliage all around without a single building in sight. All modernization was gone, as was the very concept of a school.

"... I think I went a little off course." Not that he knew how to control the darned meteor in the first place.

Edited 2015-03-12 16:15 (UTC)

"Noooo! Alien isn't the name of a person? Alien means that you're someone from another planet! You know, a person from space? I just wondered because you came down in a big rock. Like an asteroid or meteor or something."

A hunk of space rock was hardly the Starship Enterprise or whatever, but still.

"Smash Academy is the place I was going to show you! Really? You're only a little tiny bit off course - this is the woods out back!" he said, gesturing around at the trees that surrounded them. "Lots of people from the school like to come here and look around and stuff. The school is only a short walk away!"

"Ah! Well, no, I am not from another planet! At least, I don't think so." This place seemed like just about any other Earthling city out there. ( Not like he knew what the contrary looked like, obviously... )

"I am from Midorijima. We are very close to the mainland of Japan!" Clear idly shuffled through his pockets and whipped out an umbrella, despite the shady willow's view of the woods around them. Why would he just tote an umbrella like that in a place like this? There was no excessive sun, nor was there even any rain.

"Are you from here, Sonny-san, or are you also a foreigner? Or... an 'alien'?" He twirled the parasol in his fingers. "That is, maybe we are both aliens!"

"Oh! I've heard of Japan! I have friends from there! I'll have to make sure to introduce you to them, OK?" he said, happy to know that Clear would have something in common with at least a few other students and some of the teachers, too.

"Me, though? I'm from a place called Kanto! It's a region that's filled with Pokémon! I don't know if you've heard of Pokémon before, but we're all over the school! I'm a kind of Pokémon called a Snorlax, and that's why I looked big and fuzzy when you first saw me. I should say, I'm sorry for spooking you!"

Poké... mon? What in the world were Pokémon? They sounded like some sort of— some sort of monster, some kind of monster whose specialty was poking other people. If they were all big and fuzzy like Sonny, then surely, these poking maneuvers were friendly greetings and paved the way for many a cuddle. He could get behind that.

"Well, if the Pokémon-san are like you, then they must be very kind," Clear obliviously decided. "I am sorry for trying to hurt you, Sonny-san! It's just that you were so big," spoken as he wrung his fingers nervously together, "and your teeth looked very sharp. I thought that you were going to eat me like the scary dogs at my house. I hope the Pokémon do not eat people."

People are friends, not food.

"Oh, they aren't all like me!" Sonny replied. He didn't want to give Clear any false hopes. "Pokémon are like any other creature. You find all kinds! Some are very friendly and sweet and some aren't. Most of the ones I know are really nice, though, so don't be too worried, OK?"

If Clear took Pokémon studies, eventually he'd have to meet Char. Char was.... not the sweetest Pokémon that ever existed. His attitudes had mellowed a little bit since the old days (At least, in Sonny's estimation.) but still. He could be a burr.

"It's OK! I really didn't mean to scare you - but don't worry too much! That stick wouldn't of hurt me much so it's fine! And I would never eat a person, so, don't be scared of that either. I don't know any Pokémon who eat people!"

Which didn't mean that such things didn't exist. Just that he didn't know any personally. (Even Char on his worst days would probably stop long before straight-up

"...then again I don't think I ever heard of a dog doing that either?" eating a man.)

"Oh, well, they do!" And so, Clear launched into one of his oddball stories of what merciless torture dogs had wrought upon him. "They barked at me a lot, and they were growling. One even tried to bite me, so I was sure that they were going to eat me! They were the junkyard dogs, and they... were very mean. Very mean and very hungry!"

The implication for any old person was obvious. The dogs were aggressively defending their territory, perhaps even their young, and were not in any way looking to eat their trespassers. How could an isolated little android recognize that much? Not very easily, natch.

"So, please be careful around the scary dogs. Those are the big ones." Certain of his Really True Facts of Life, he gave a firm nod or two. "They would probably really like to eat you, Sonny-san. They would probably like to eat anyone! It's very frightening..."

What horror stories he weaved in his corrupted little mind were definitely not enrapturing.

"Do you know what I'm going to do?" said Sonny, placing a hand gently on Clear's shoulder. "I'm going to introduce you to my good friend Jock! He's a big dog, but he's really, really friendly! Well, he's a dog Pokémon. He's big and orange and fluffy? And he loves to be pet and hugged, and I can teach you how to play fetch with him! And I promise he won't bark at you or eat you!"

Sonny had been barked at by plenty of dogs. And they had every right to do so, so far as Sonny figured. Any creature had the right to tell you when you were getting too close to their territory for comfort! But he'd never been afraid of being eaten.

If anything, the dogs should have had that fear themselves.

"He's just one of the people at school I bet I can help you make friends with!"

"A- ah, well, that is— I don't think that would be necessary, but..." Clear could only manage stammering without thought for what else could be said. A big, orange, fluffy dog sounded cute as equally as it sounded terrifying. If Sonny asserted his niceness, then who was he to deny him? That would have just been rude. Still, he couldn't imagine confronting a huge canine without fearing being devoured down to the meat on his bones, however artificial it was.

"I could meet him," he finally managed, not wanting to come across as impolite. "If Sonny-san says that he is nice, then I suppose he must be. As long as he won't eat me, then that will be okay."

With a quick exhalation, he found comfort in the fact that he wasn't alone here. That much was enough to instill bravery he hadn't found before. How shameful that he couldn't have gotten that himself over something as simple as a pooch...

"He won't eat you, I promise!" Sonny replied with a grin. He hoped that Jock wouldn't prove him wrong, either. Not that he doubted his friend. He DID however doubt the school, sometimes. It could be pretty whacked out and who knew if Jock would be hit with a sudden cannibalism curse from eating a poisoned pastry tomorrow?

...Sonny knocked on a tree and made a wish.

"Anyway, let's walk to the school and I'll show you around!"

"Oh! Yes, let's!" To think that he'd entirely forgotten why he was here! Distractions like vicious, bloodthirsty dogs captured him far too easily for his own liking. Note to self: Stop thinking about scary dogs.

"I must admit, Sonny-san," mused Clear, tapping the front of his respirator as they walked, beneath vibrant rays and chirping songbirds. "I don't know how school works. All I know is that you go to a school to learn and to live somewhere new. May I ask for the daily routine? I am very rigid about my routines! Rigid!"

If he understood what to do right then and there, he'd certainly be more prepared to adhere.

"I'm not rigid at all!" Sonny replied with a chuckle. "Mostly? Because I'm a Snorlax. So, I have to sleep and eat a lot. Sometimes, I get hungry or tired really easily so I have to take a nap or eat a snack to stay healthy. But the school is pretty good about things like routines? Classes start in the morning, end in the afternoon, and curfew is eleven at night!"

On second thought.... that was pretty broad, huh? He should be more specific.

"There's also morning recess, lunch and afternoon recess. So, we get a lot of meal breaks. I'll introduce you to Nancy, too! He's the lunch bear!"

That was quite a bit of information to absorb! What Clear could gather about scheduling was that there were classes in the morning and noon with breaks for recess and lunch, whatever the former was. Recess, recession — was it just time to take for oneself without particular purpose? Then again, Sonny did mention meal breaks. Were they just fancy terms for breakfast and afternoon snacks?

"Lunch... bear?" One would have thought that he'd cower in fear at the thought of a large bear running the cafeteria, especially with his apprehension over dogs. Instead, however, the little oddball beamed, the prospects far from terrifying.

"Does that mean... it's a teddy bear?!" He's always wanted to cuddle a real-life teddy bear!

"He's a kind of Pokémon called an Ursaring!" Sonny clarified. "So, kiiiiind of like a teddybear! But with big claws and teeth! Oh, and he has a laser eye. I don't know why? That's not a normal thing for an Ursaring to have."

One day, he'd ask about that.

"But Nancy makes the BEST chili! And he makes tater tots a lot, and pizza and salad! There's always lots of jello cups and milk and sometimes he makes a bunch of little sandwiches!!!"

Oh. Man. Sonny was so hungry, now.

"....would you like me to show you the cafeteria first?" he asked, unable to hide the hopeful tone in his voice.

"Aaah..." Clear couldn't even name some of those foods — chili, tater tots, and jello weren't to be found in Japan — but he did hear good things about pizza. He also loved salads and sandwiches! Why, he made those for his grandfather all the time, right alongside his delicious corn chowder.

It was a miracle his stomach hadn't begun to growl already.

"That would be a good idea, yes. Maybe Nancy-san can make us some food. I have money, so I can pay for us both!" The android beamed. He knew that bringing his late-grandfather's savings was a good idea!

"Do you think Nancy-san would take yen? That is what I have." That was all he had.

"Oh, no no! It's OK!" Sonny said, waving his hands at Clear "You don't have to pay! The food is all provided to me, and I can get plenty of extra for you so it's fine! You don't need to use your... Yen at all!"

....it felt weird saying Yen without Poké in front of it.

"The school gets a lot of stuff for us for free, because we help protect the city when bad stuff happens. It's a fighting school and it trains us to be saviors of the town and our own worlds! It's pretty neat!!!"

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