O, Signage of Truth and Virtue! Enter into Our Swoledom: Enter into Our Hearts!

[raced_god]

Who: Max, Captain Falcon, you?????
What: Hanging posters. Maybe some other stuff. Maybe whatever you want.
When: Week of April 21st.
Where: Around campus and also the locker rooms I guess.
Warnings: Swolitude. Tiny towels. Man talk.



The posters have sprung up overnight. Tacked to bulletin boards, plastered on lampposts--anywhere that can feasibly hold a flyer, the posters are there. The question, then, is where are they coming from? Who is putting them up?

The answer is perhaps obvious. If one pays attention, it is not difficult to find one Max Powers around campus with a stapler, one Captain Falcon following him with a stack of flyers.

One can only imagine the things that run through his head. I've saved the universe, he thinks to himself. I am the greatest racecar driver that ever lived, he thinks, with every clack of Max's stapler. I own islands.

And yet

And yet, dear reader, there they are.

Comments

[magicdancer]

"Good," she replied. "Because it really looks like the big guy here has trouble getting through doorways."

[tank_rockarms]

"I get through doorways fine," said Max. "Usually. 'Cause I'm careful."

[raced_god]

"Usually," he quipped, "is the operative word."

Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

[magicdancer]

"Usually," Shantae repeated.

"Well, I get enough of a workout dancing as is," she explained.

[raced_god]

"Oh no," Falcon said in his most deadpan voice possible, "cardio."

[tank_rockarms]

"You're never gonna look even sorta like a box if you keep doin' cardio," said Max, as if this was a negative thing.

[magicdancer]

Were the big slabs of beef mocking her? Because it sure sounded like it. Shantae's arms crossed, and the glare she shot them could bore holes in metal.

"And just what exactly is wrong with dancing?" she asked.

[raced_god]

"There's nothing wrong with dancing," he replied, sounding much more sincere, because really. There was nothing wrong with dancing. "Don't listen to Max."

Every thing I write in this log gets progressively more absurd

[bluetanker]

"You just ain't gonna get swole off of dancing. You never get outta Ottermode and into Beastmode. It's pretty much scientific fact."

It was pretty much a scientific fact. "If you're fine with Ottermode, I guess dancin's alright, but that ain't for us."

See what Mas is doing? He's including you in that statement, Falcon.

[raced_god]

No. No don't, Max. Falcon looked genuinely affronted to be included in that statement. He was pretty sure the science of Ottermode and Beastmode was dubious at best.

"If she's a career dancer, then it'd just be impractical.

[magicdancer]

"It just so HAPPENS that my career is Guardian Genie, but not only is dancing a big part of my heritage, it's the source of my magic," she retorted. "I'm glad for you beasts, but I'm happy being an otter. I think. I'm already confused by this analogy."

[bluetanker]

"I guess there's gotta be otters in the world so the beasts look even beastlier," Max philosophized.

[raced_god]

"Max..."

That was it. That was all Falcon managed.

[magicdancer]

"You think whatever you want," Shantae answered. "But I for one think I've had enough of this. Have fun being beasts."

That said, she turned and left in a bit of a huff.