punchtheflute (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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smash_logs2014-04-02 08:56 pm
punchtheflute) wrote in smash_logs2014-04-02 08:56 pm
Candy crush saga is not an appable series.
Who: Sonny, Jolt, Likeminded folks who want to eat all the terrible candy
What: Eating all the terrible candy
Where: Somewhere on campus under a tree
When: Let's just say this weekend.
Warnings: Too much candy is bad for you. Unless you're Sonny. Or Jolt.
It had been a chance meeting at S*Mart (Shop Smart! Shop S*Mart!) but it had blossomed into something wonderful.
You see, even in our consumer culture, driven by sales and promotions and discount pricing, sometimes there can be too much of one particular thing. Like, say, Valentines Day Candy. Remember Valentines day? You probably wish that you didn't. But someone at S*Mart had sure been on the ball because they had ordered a triple sized quantity of candy to fill those shelves. And those end caps. And those stack out displays. And a massive portion of the stock room. And oh holy crap what are we going to do with all these sweet tarts and cherry cordials and heart shaped boxes of pink whateveritis that haven't sold yet!?
You put it on sale, that's what you do. You heavily discount it. Like... just try and get it out the door kind of discount it. Like, this store is going to lose thousands on this but we can't return this stuff to the vendor so people please come and buy boxes of chocolate for a dime and bags of chalky aspirins with vapid sayings printed on them in god only knows what for a nickel and if you buy ten dollars worth we'll throw in some Easter candy because we ordered too much Easter candy too.
Oh. Yeah. And that chance meeting I mentioned earlier? It was Sonny Moe and Jolt.
The aftermath of this as you can probably imagine is two young guys, relaxing in the sunshine, strumming on a ukulele and eating inappropriate masses of super discounted candy. If that sounds like your idea of a good time? Well come on over.
[[OOC: I'm going to make one thread for Sonny and Jolt to just chat. Anyone else who wants to come on over can feel free to start a new thread of their own! ]]
What: Eating all the terrible candy
Where: Somewhere on campus under a tree
When: Let's just say this weekend.
Warnings: Too much candy is bad for you. Unless you're Sonny. Or Jolt.
It had been a chance meeting at S*Mart (Shop Smart! Shop S*Mart!) but it had blossomed into something wonderful.
You see, even in our consumer culture, driven by sales and promotions and discount pricing, sometimes there can be too much of one particular thing. Like, say, Valentines Day Candy. Remember Valentines day? You probably wish that you didn't. But someone at S*Mart had sure been on the ball because they had ordered a triple sized quantity of candy to fill those shelves. And those end caps. And those stack out displays. And a massive portion of the stock room. And oh holy crap what are we going to do with all these sweet tarts and cherry cordials and heart shaped boxes of pink whateveritis that haven't sold yet!?
You put it on sale, that's what you do. You heavily discount it. Like... just try and get it out the door kind of discount it. Like, this store is going to lose thousands on this but we can't return this stuff to the vendor so people please come and buy boxes of chocolate for a dime and bags of chalky aspirins with vapid sayings printed on them in god only knows what for a nickel and if you buy ten dollars worth we'll throw in some Easter candy because we ordered too much Easter candy too.
Oh. Yeah. And that chance meeting I mentioned earlier? It was Sonny Moe and Jolt.
The aftermath of this as you can probably imagine is two young guys, relaxing in the sunshine, strumming on a ukulele and eating inappropriate masses of super discounted candy. If that sounds like your idea of a good time? Well come on over.
[[OOC: I'm going to make one thread for Sonny and Jolt to just chat. Anyone else who wants to come on over can feel free to start a new thread of their own! ]]
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He shoveled down a few more handfuls of assorted candies. He was getting hungry! Er! Hungrier!
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Not that Sonny cared much about eating ants. He just didn't think it was fair to eat them if you could avoid it.
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And so it came to pass that candy was stowed away, meat was cooked, and the best dinner ever was created and consumed. The legends say that to gaze upon the burgers they created would cause a man to fall to his knees and weep tears of joy and disbelief that something so beautiful could exist in a world so full of sin and vice. The heavens rang out in triumph at the culinary masterpieces.