No elaboration, no telltale change in that tail of his. Whether that stung or just verified what he already knew, he apparently didn't intend to say. "You'dve been better off with Rhys or Blast." Not so much self-deprecation as a statement of objective fact: there was no use denying all the harm that latching onto Char had done. He was quite sure that in the beginning, it had only been done out of desperation -- exactly because there was no Blast or Rhys to turn to, only that too-fiery Charmeleon.
"Y'keep sayin' you only need me to be me, but look how messed up we are, kid. How messed up I am," he corrected himself -- Bulba had never done anything but patiently wait for his big brother to figure out how to be one. "This whole stupid bullshit with Max kinda just made a whole lotta stuff a whole lot harder to ignore." Now it was getting a little harder to stay as consciously unaffected-looking; a nervous little ripple of movement down the length of his tail here, a hand running through his hair there. "I keep thinkin' I must be movin' forward. Then something like this happens and I realize all I been doin' is treadin' water." A particularly morbid turn of phrase for a Charizard, but this was something that he was kind of struggling to find words for; this was not Char's most eloquent moment. "I'm startin' to wonder if the only way to get past it is to deal with somethin' I just... don't wanna accept about myself."
A rush of words that he was kind of regretting saying; these sorts of confessions, after all, just lead to Bulba looking at him with that unbearable in-pain look in his eyes. Char bit his lip, casting an anxious look over to his brother, searching for that familiar sign to just shut up already before he, once again, made the situation worse.
hurt me more dawg, she says........
No elaboration, no telltale change in that tail of his. Whether that stung or just verified what he already knew, he apparently didn't intend to say. "You'dve been better off with Rhys or Blast." Not so much self-deprecation as a statement of objective fact: there was no use denying all the harm that latching onto Char had done. He was quite sure that in the beginning, it had only been done out of desperation -- exactly because there was no Blast or Rhys to turn to, only that too-fiery Charmeleon.
"Y'keep sayin' you only need me to be me, but look how messed up we are, kid. How messed up I am," he corrected himself -- Bulba had never done anything but patiently wait for his big brother to figure out how to be one. "This whole stupid bullshit with Max kinda just made a whole lotta stuff a whole lot harder to ignore." Now it was getting a little harder to stay as consciously unaffected-looking; a nervous little ripple of movement down the length of his tail here, a hand running through his hair there. "I keep thinkin' I must be movin' forward. Then something like this happens and I realize all I been doin' is treadin' water." A particularly morbid turn of phrase for a Charizard, but this was something that he was kind of struggling to find words for; this was not Char's most eloquent moment. "I'm startin' to wonder if the only way to get past it is to deal with somethin' I just... don't wanna accept about myself."
A rush of words that he was kind of regretting saying; these sorts of confessions, after all, just lead to Bulba looking at him with that unbearable in-pain look in his eyes. Char bit his lip, casting an anxious look over to his brother, searching for that familiar sign to just shut up already before he, once again, made the situation worse.