PUT AWAY YOUR SHAKE WEIGHT. GET A REAL WORKOUT. BE A REAL MAN. OR WOMAN. GO LIFTING WITH MAX.

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

Who: Max and YOU and your intense feelings of inadequacy.
What: WORKING OUT IN THE WEIGHT ROOM
Where: THE WEIGHT ROOM
When: EVERY TIME August 8th - 21st
Warnings: 150% TESTOSTERONE. Max may swear at some point.

After spending two weeks as a venusaur, and not being able to work out, Max returned to his normal self. He could still feel the shameful, shameful potbelly that he used to have as a venusaur. Two weeks of not working out is like two weeks of wasted life for Max. And now he doesn't have all of those darned classes to take getting in the way of getting in a real workout. As if somehow six hours of weightlifting a day hadn't been a real workout before.

So anyway. Max is pretty much living in the weight room when he isn't doing his cardio in the mornings, having a meal, or sleeping. Or teaching the occasional class. But he's happy to take out some time to show new students around the weight room, or to help the less muscular set up some sort of workout routine. Need a spotter for the bench press? Max is your man. He may be wearing a tank top that says this on it.

((START A THREAD, GIVE A TIME, PUT ON YOUR HEADBANDS AND GYM SHORTS, AND TURN UP THE CLASSIC ROCK-SLASH-PUNK. YOU'RE IN MAX'S WORLD NOW.))

Comments

Jeffery Angelos you are an unpleasable jerk

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, lots," said Max, pointing to the dumbbell rack against one of the walls. "Just stay away from the adjustable ones that're on a rack by themselves, those go up to like 800 pounds."

just doin my duty as a goodhorrible citizen

[princeangel.livejournal.com]

800 pounds. 800 pounds. "... 800 pounds?"

That was impossible. Like physically impossible. Who the hell could possibly lift 800 pounds of--

Jeff stared at Max.

Oh. Right.

"God, this school..." he muttered to himself, checking out the normal, nonadjustable dumbbells.

More like... badgreat... citizen

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, I do that," said Max. "You can use the regular adjustable dumbbells if you want." He'd gotten the set for girls on the football team out for Azelf. They were on the floor. Max pointed at them with his boot. "They go from 5 pounds to 50 in 2.5 pound steps."

he is the best at being the worst

[princeangel.livejournal.com]

"Alright..." Now that sounded more manageable. Probably a good idea to start slow and light. It had been a while since Jeff had lifted weights.

Or worked out in any way, shape, or form.

Thinking about it, he realized that this may take a while. And Max was still there, his sweaty presence was hard to ignore. If there was one thing Jeff valued above all else, it was his privacy.

Carefully, he picked up the 5 pound weights. Then he stared at Max. Silently sending mental vibes for him to leave Jeff the fuck alone. While the blond had tact, hopefully the big oaf would at least notice and understand the sudden glare of annoyance and expectation thrown in his direction.

Re: he is the best at being the worst

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

"You doin' aerobics? 'Cause those weights are way the heck too small unless you're gonna do aerobics to do you any good. Start with the fifteens and see how hard that is for you," said Max.

He is totally not leaving. In fact, he appears to be micromanaging your workout.

[princeangel.livejournal.com]

Oh dear god no. The oaf was trying to give him tips. Like Jeff didn't know how to use basic gym equipment.

... Okay so maybe it had been a while. And he always had his trainer around to spot him and suggest what to do next. But like hell he was going to follow the blue haired dunce's suggestions and--

Jeff stared down at the weight in his hand. And then at the other weights still on the floor. Oh god he wasn't actually thinking of...

With a frown, he swapped weights. The fifteens were easy enough to use.

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

"There you go, that's a lot better ain't it?" Max asked. "Do twenty reps at that weight and see if you burn out. If you don't you should move up to 20s and see what you can do there."

Max will. Be your personal trainer.

[princeangel.livejournal.com]

Jeff did as he was told. It was... odd, all things considered. He still hated the large man, broken door and insulted yelling and all. But if there was one thing that the blond could appreciate, it was order. Direction. Rules and regulations.

Frankly, he didn't know much about working out. Only that doing it on a regular basis was good for the body. He supposed it would've been easy enough to research, but why bother when there was already someone else who could tell you about it? That was like making yourself a cup of tea when a butler was standing right there. What a waste of service.

Still... Jeff supposed that if the blue haired doofus was going to help him, then he might as well pretend to civil. "So," the blond continued his reps, "how often do you work out?" To get results like that, the expected answer was every day.

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

This terrible oaf of a man is one of your instructors now, Jeffums. Never forget this.

"Me? Six hours a day, six days a week. An hour of cardio and an hour of weights in the mornin', then two hours of weights in the afternoon and another two in the evenin'," said Max. "I break the days down by body part, so like arms, forearms, chest, abs is Monday, back and shoulders is Tuesday, Wednesday's quads, calves and abs, that sorta thing."

Max has no life.

[princeangel.livejournal.com]

Six hours a day, six days a week? Jeez. That was some schedule. Did Max do anything other than sleep, eat, and work out?

Oh right, he was a teacher now. File 'teaching class' in that list. Somewhere. Somehow.

Finishing the reps, he put the weights down and picked up the 20s. "Do you even have free time?" Not that Jeff was genuinely curious about the oaf's life. But if nothing else, the blond like to be knowledgeable about those around him.

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

"Yeah I got loads of free time compared to when I was a student here," said Max. "Heck, six hours a day is less than most people work, and I get started at 5am, so I've got the first two hours done by 7am, and I've got the rest of the mornin' to do whatever."

"Tell me if you hit your limit with the 20s or not," Max instructed. Sorry, Jeff, you didn't look all that strong to Max. So he was betting you'd struggle with this.

Though you could surprise him and be able to use the 25s. Surprise him, Jeff.

[princeangel.livejournal.com]

One of Jeff's eyebrows rose. "Honestly? How did you have less free time as a student?" Clubs and after school activities were one thing. But surely even as a faculty member, Max wouldn't stop doing those sorts of things. Was it the homework? Jeff bet it was the homework.

Max. Max no. You did not just challenge him. Sure the blond couldn't lift as much as the blue haired gorilla, but god damn if he was going to let anyone think lowly of him.

Finishing the reps, he picked up the 25s. Oh okay that was kind of heavy. But Jeff could do it. He totally could. Look at him go. And okay maybe struggling after only one lift and starting to get winded but he got this. For serious.

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

"Careful, you'll throw somethin' out if you go at it that hard," said Max. "You can't get stronger if you get laid up."

[princeangel.livejournal.com]

"I'm fine," the blond grunted at he continued lifting the weights. He could do this. He'd show that blue haired orangutan not to underestimate Jeff Angel. The tingling pain running through his arms didn't mean anything. No pain, no gain, right?

Although he slowed down a bit at the end, he managed to get through the reps. Putting down the 25s, Jeff took a few deep breaths. Ugh, he was already starting to sweat. He could use a towel. And some water.

HOW MANY REPS DID HE DO is it three I bet it was three

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

"Careful of your shoulders, you were doin' more than you shoulda," said Max. "Tomorrow you're not gonna be able to wash your hair. Your arms won't go up."

"You tryin' to go for hypertropy or you tryin' to go for strength trainin'?" Max asked. "Workin' like that's only good if you're tryin' to build up a lot of muscle," said Max. You don't seem the type, Jeff.

NU-UH! it was totally an amazing number like 5 or 6

[princeangel.livejournal.com]

"What?" The hair comment confused him a little. Did pushing himself like that really have such dire consequences? Jeff wasn't exactly feeling any serious pain at the moment. He hoped that Max was joking around.

He huffed at Max's question. So was everything he just did pointless? God Max, you were the worst exercise helper ever. "Not really. Only trying to build back what I already had. Mostly I'm just trying to get back--" the blond quickly corrected himself, "--to stay in shape."

Four.

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

Yes, Jeff. It did. Tomorrow. You will feel such pains. And the day after. You will also feel such pains. It takes hours for the acid (yes, acid) to build up in your muscles.

Have a wonderful next two days, Jeff Angel.

"So if you don't wanna build much more muscle, you don't wanna work like that. You wanna do maybe four sets at a weight that's not easy but ain't hard for you to do. Don't work till you burn out like that. You'll build up some lean muscle that way, but nothin' crazy."

Come on, Jeff. Everyone knows this.

shhhhh let him pretend

[princeangel.livejournal.com]

Jeff just stared at Max. That would have been nice to know, oh maybe... before he started lifting weights. You would think that'd be one of the first questions to ask. Though to be honest, Max had proved yet again that he was hardly a man of logic.

"Ugh, fine," he groaned. Jeff was starting to regret ever setting foot in the weight room. How was he supposed to know the finer details of working out? That's what he always had a trainer for.

then let's pretend that in this picture, Vinnie is Jeff

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

"So you ain't goin' for size you're just goin' for health," said Max. "You could use a little more, though. You're sorta scrawny."

Gosh, Max. You're really helpful and also not a jerk.

done and done

[princeangel.livejournal.com]

Jeff bristled at Max's coarse words. "I'm perfectly fit for my height and weight, thank you very much. The only reason why I'm even here is because I've been so busy with homework and classes that I've been somewhat slacking on exercise."

Re: done and done

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

"Nah, you could use another, what, twenty, thirty pounds on you," said Max.

This is coming from the guy that weighs like 350 pounds. Most of which is 100% grade-A Orange Star beef.

[princeangel.livejournal.com]

20 or 30 pounds? Oh god, just the thought made Jeff's stomach turn. If he gained that much weight, he would be border-lining from acceptably thin to slightly over average. And that would not due at all.

"I'll pass on that," he replied.

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

Slightly over average with muscle. Which would make you better.

"Then you should be goin' for maybe four sets of eight to twelve reps at a weight you can do that you ain't burnin' out on. Like you just did."

[princeangel.livejournal.com]

"I didn't--" Jeff snapped, but quickly caught himself. He was falling into the oaf's pace. Getting angry would mean that he actually cared what Max said. Which he didn't. Of course not.

He did, however, care about his physical features and stature. If one wanted to get anywhere in life, they had to be well groomed and know how to take care of themselves. As it was, Jeff was falling behind on his social duties.

Letting out a huffy sigh, he relented. "Fine. Four sets of eight to twelve reps. Anything else?"

[tank-rockarms.livejournal.com]

But you did, Jeff. You quit after four because you couldn't lift more. You were doing reps with your tiny baby arms until you couldn't do anymore. That's the very definition of burning out.

"Rest ninety seconds to two minutes between sets, try to do four sets total of every exercise. Lift at least twice a week with a day in between to rest. Three times a week's better. If you only do two days a week, try not to repeat any of the same exercises on each day."

Max just kept ticking off the rules of weightlifting.