crystal_ballin: (Sprite)
crystal_ballin ([personal profile] crystal_ballin) wrote in [community profile] smash_logs 2015-05-09 06:54 am (UTC)

"We'll do tarot this time, dude," said Hagakure, pulling a tarot deck out from underneath the deck.

"Time to do ten different readings. This is gonna take awhile, dude," he added.

So, he drew out the cards and read their interconnections as regarded Mr. Sunshine Mortimer's love life. The process took two hours.:

97/100 - incorrect -- You and the girl you are thinking of will have five children and then get divorced after you get hooked on drugs.

10/100 - correct -- The girl you are thinking of is no longer interested in you because you were too slow, and you missed your chance at a relationship with her.

17/100 - correct -- The girl you are thinking of is no longer interested in you because you were too slow, and you missed your chance at a relationship with her.

7/100 - correct -- The girl you are thinking of is no longer interested in you because you were too slow, and you missed your chance at a relationship with her.

80/100 - incorrect -- The girl you are thinking of was only using you for the wild sex, and there was never even a chance at a relationship based on emotional love.

95/100 - incorrect -- The girl you are thinking will marry you on her deathbed, leaving you a widow before age 30.

55/100 - incorrect -- The girl you are thinking of will spurn your advances in real life, all while forming a relationship with you online; when she comes to discover your true identity, she will at first be adverse to the relationship, but eventually come to terms with it, and marry you.

94/100 - incorrect -- She awaits your call; you will meet up soon, and over a delicious picnic, rekindle the love that once existed between the two of you. You will be married within two years, and have at least two, but no more than four, children together.

92/100 - incorrect -- Days before you are set to marry the woman you are thinking of, she will be abducted into a carriage by a seducer; you will throw yourself into the river and drown from sorrow in response.

10/100 - correct -- The girl you are thinking of is no longer interested in you because you were too slow, and you missed your chance at a relationship with her.

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